this will probably be my last post in tabulas. *pats tabulas* lasted only this long.
been blog surfing for about an hour to get some inspiration. ho ho. realised that a lot of teens have blogs with proper layouts nowadays. i'm so outdated.
suddenly feel like blogs are preppy. maybe should get a photolog since have nothing much to say anyway. but have no camera so will give up this idea.

O level results are out, but dont know anybody... so do not care.
Muu asked me how i would know which day the A levels are released. what a funny question.
if i didnt know, i'd just not turn up, and my classmates would just call me and say, where the hell are you.
it doesnt really matter if i know whether its 4th march or 7th march.
just visited the penn forum at cc. really would not know what to wear on the first day of school at penn. so intimidating.

have been keeping accounts of my expenditure and income.
dont know why the agencies are taking so long to pay me. maybe they want to con me.
but at last, my account has exceeded $6000! ha ha. yes my life savings. that's how pitiful i am. and everyone thinks im so rich.
not poor. but not rich either.
thinking of whether to attempt to increase this amount or just spend it anyway. $6000 will be peanuts when i start working. i might as well buy things i like now.

i miss my little darling spoilt brats.
i miss jiaxuan and kimberly.
i miss kenneth who cant stop talking.
i miss ernest.
i miss the joyo triplets especially steven.
i miss chelsi.
i miss nicole and leanne.
i miss khian wei.
i miss dodges.

*dissolves in a flood of tears*

i changed my parting so my fringe isnt short anymore *yay! out comes the confetti*
thinking of changing my layout since i'm so bloody bored. but i hate this stupid tabulas code, so maybe i will move to diaryland or something.
what shall i put in my new layout?
okay, getting myself excited over nothing.
have spent the entire day doing NOTHING. i miss Patsons so badly.

i hate my life.
have i mentioned that before?
ha. haircut at gorgeous DID NOT turn out gorgeous!
i wonder what is it with hairdressers and me. is it my hair? or my face?
they ALWAYS snip off more than i ask them to, and they always cut my fringe so short that i look like a gongkia
now i look terrible. luckily i dont need to go out.
hopefully my hair will grow into something normal in a week. i cant go back to get my A level results looking like the joke i am now.
anyway, so i've decided that i shall never ever ask them to cut my hair short. i will always say the 3 magic words: "keep the length".
and also, i've decided to keep my hair long again. ha ha. how ironic.

went to Wild Wild Wet with emu, grace, mich, ky and xue yesterday. it was alright, definitely not worth the price ($12.50) but i guess it also depends on who you go with.

everybody is starting to freak out about upcoming A level results. i'm not thinking about it. i'm not scared either.
not because i feel confident. on the contrary, i feel totally wretched.
and it's because i feel so lousy that i think i wouldnt be surprised no matter how badly i did... i know how well i perform.
yep, life goes on. no matter what happens (unless you die, of course)
but even if you die, the world continues to spin.
ahhh, wise words from the wise man.

been spending too much lately. will spend all my pay in no time if this continues.
NONONONOOOOO!

i'm really pissed all of a sudden because:
1. there are 2 new temp girls at Patsons. which means that me and emu could have gone to work there with boon. stupid girls.
2. the camo cargo pants size 16 are sold out at abercrombiekids.com
3. mist pants size 1 are sold out at gojane.com and there was gojane spree!

grrr. so now im reaaally pissed, mainly because of reason #1. one of the new girls is actually serene from dunman choir. and the other, boon believes to be rebecca's friend. okay whatever.
i just really want to go back to work at patsons. and i really want to work with boon and yy.
yy and i have such bad luck. no kidding. it cannot possibly get worse.

and now boon says that she saw a bunch of girls applying yesterday. gross. i cant bear the thought of gross girls teaching my kids. urghhhhh.

i've never been more happy for the weekend since i started working.
like i said, as an employee of patsons, you dont get monday blues and you dont care whether it's friday or monday.
in fact, justin doesnt come on mondays, so it's even better.

*sigh*
so, i will be quitting on monday.
wanted to quit today, but thought i wouldnt spoil andrea's weekend
andrea is my recruitment agent. she sounds nice on the phone, so i quite like her.
yep, and also because when i went to the office, i thought it was okay, that i could still bear it for a while more.
actually, i guess i can, but still! i wont want to work for more than this coming week (ie 25th feb)

it's just too bad that andrea was so efficient. if only she called me a week later, then i can quit just before the A levels results are released.
then i wont have a one week lull in between, not knowing whether to continue looking for a job or to fill in my scholarship forms.

but anyway, quitting on monday for sure.
actually i guess it's not so bad, because i have 3 lunchmates.
pei jian ( the other temp girl, who's actually hoping to convert to perm) and yvonne. and sometimes anna.
yvonne is very nice to me. or maybe she is just very nice.
she says that i look very smart (ah ji agrees) and that i have very nice eyes (second person to say that)
ha ha!
the first person to say i have pretty eyes is... oh no, cant remember her name. the year 4 girl who was in volleyball club with me and xue.
she called me "pretty eyes"
i dont have pretty eyes, but if i had double eyelids, then maybe i would.

i switched jobs!
yesterday was my last day at patsons.
and today... was my first day at this japanese company called JST Components
ah whatever. basically i'm there to do admin.
to be honest, i'm not sure if it's counted as admin.
maybe more like filing and sorting.

i would surely love a real admin job with a computer and stuff to type.
if i had a computer then i can monitor flowerpod's sprees. ha ha and i would rarely miss any!
especially now when i'm lemming for gojane spree.
sigh.
whatsmore, i'm there alone.

okay, so there's another temp girl, but she's a poly grad and she's those type of chinese ah-lian.
you know what i mean.
not that it's that bad, but still not really my kind of buddy.
if only i could shove her away and emu take her place. ha ha!

the best thing is that i get $7 an hour, so now i will be making $63 a day. ha ha!
i plan to quit soon actually. like within 2 weeks. ha ha.
dont forget the A level results will be out soon and i surely need time to weep/fill in scholarship forms frantically, whichever way it goes.

i havent signed any contract yet, so it's okay. andrea (my recruitment agent) says she will be mailing me a contract. hmm.
anyway if i want to quit, i dont know who to tell either.
the bad thing is that the place is in this obscure far-flung little corner of aljunied. no straight bus home and not beside aljunied mrt.

if they hadnt raised the rate to $7, i think i would quit. ha ha.
i spent half the time staring into space/pretending to be doing something/dawdling over my tasks so i will have less free time.
and i spent the other half messaging so now my battery is flat! in 2 days!

i was actually thinking of the children at patsons the entire day.
i kept thinking, now they're doing... this and that.
sigh.
i doubt i'll ever like this job as much as patsons.
my butt aches from sitting while i used to get tired from standing.
and i didnt talk at all, unlike at patsons.
this job gives me $$$ but it also gives me monday blues, even though monday hasnt rolled around yet.
or should i say, it gives me morning blues. every morning.
maybe i should tell miss chin to call me back if she needs a teacher. haha.

went to send jialing off on sunday.
i felt very scared at the thought that it could be me... someday.
extremely scared. i cant say how much. the fear spills out of my heart.
gek tried to make jialing cry but she didnt. instead big jialing cried. ha ha.

then me ally and big jialing went to tampines. the place has changed so much.
it's creepy.
we saw peiqi. i got a rude shock when i realised she's in sec 3 this year.
it seems like just yesterday when she was a sec 1.
so there, everybody's changing. even when you feel dead and hopeless, the world just continues to spin.

decided to change jobs, so sent out half a dozen email apps this morning and in the afternoon, i already had a job offer.
AND they want me to start tomorrow.
WOW.
but miss chin left before i could tell her. eeps. so i guess i wont be starting tomorrow.
the bad thing is that this new job pays exactly the same. and not $7 as i hoped.
emu's got this 2 week temp at tampines which is $7.50 per hour. i so want to go. plus we can work together. why cant it be like 1 month???

ah. chinese new year.
i've never liked it because my mother likes to drag me to all my relatives' house for the entire day
and all they do is gamble, which i dont.
dont ask me why. i just dont think it's very fun.
so i am left with nothing to do except to rot.
and i see the same people everyday, so i dont even get to increase my hongpao $$$.

supposed to go to the airport at 1pm.
also supposed to go to auntie's house today.
havent told my mother yet.

i think the time to change my job has come.
perhaps the novelty and newness of the job has worn off, so i'm feeling like crap at work.
it infuriates me that the piggy little kids can call me names (loser) and i cant even say a single bad word back.
me and boon have decided that on our last day, we are going to call justin every single name in the book.

except that there is no new job on the horizon.
i want an office job that pays $7 per hour and more for OT.
siqing says she's quitting her job (again)
it's just data entry at starhub where she spends 8 hours a day typing names into the computer and she gets $7 per hour, $10.50 for OT and extra $10 if she works the later shift (which is 11am to 8.30pm) and cab fare if she works the night shift (which is 12.30pm to 10pm)
but i dont know her well enough to ask her, because she did mention she wanted to get janice to do her job.
aiiii.

this CNY, it's come to me with shocking realisation that i'm not the only person who's changing.
oh, slow of me, after 19 years do i realise this simple fact.
but seeing my cousins look so different, i'm taken aback. not very pleasantly surprised.
damien no longer looks like a boy. he looks like a man.
darren is still sweet but he's already in pri 3.
kaixiang looks unrecognisable. he used to be cute, but now he looks distorted.
and we found out that andrew is actually in normal stream, which means he's in sec 5 this year.
my cousins are no longer children. they are teenagers.
and when our generation takes over, they will disappear into our city as strangers to me. lost to me forever.

woke up early today because have been sleeping TOO much!
unbelievable. i have so much free time.
the only good thing i can say about sleeping too much is that maybe hopefully perhaps my eyerings/bags will disappear, since mine are rather mild.
so, have decided, that must go out during the weekends. if not will spend the day rotting at home.

i feel like my face is getting fairer and fairer! i dont know why.
but more spots are appearing. i'm beginning to look rather mole-y. WHY?
tonight will be going to bugis street with muu. hopefully my tote bag is still there!

no work tomorrow. ha ha. but like i told ling, no work = no money.
actually... my job is rather enjoyable. i dont ever get monday blues. and the week passes by without me noticing.
plus sometimes we get to eat for free too, cos they have leftovers. woohoo.
my only gripe is that its pretty far. why cant it be at katong?